OLD LOVE

  

Every once in a while, we hear stories of two old people, who once knew each other, finding each other again in the twilight of their lives. Maybe they were classmates or grew up together; maybe they once dated and it didn’t work out. Sometimes, they had married, raised children, and either lost their spouses or had marriages that just never worked out. No matter the circumstances, their paths crossed once more; something from the past rang a tiny bell and an old love that simmered, but never died, comes around again. Like a hot coal that lies unnoticed in the ashes of a bonfire, a spark gets struck once more and love is rekindled. These are the Cinderella stories that often bring a smile to our faces.

 

But all too often that’s not the case, and those same two lonely old single people sit in their homes, not knowing what to do. They’re torn between an old love that no longer exists, or being hurt once, they’re now gun shy. They remember the loved ones they spent so many years together with. They wonder what people will think if they try and turn a page and wring out what little happiness that may still be there in their hearts and souls—if only they could find someone to share their dwindling days with. They’re tired of cooking a special meal and being the only one at the table; tired of planting flowers no one will see; tired of dressing up with no one to impress and nowhere to go. Mostly though, they’re tired of not having anyone to love and care for. From the Movie A Love Story came the quote, “Love is never having to say you’re sorry.” I think back to my life with my wife and if there is one thing that will always bother me, it is the times, I hurt her and never said I was sorry. Apologies are a way of healing. Healing allows you to move on, hopefully wiser for your bad experience. Healing is a lot like a scab on a wound. It takes a while but eventually it falls off and is forgotten.  It’s then that you move on. My wife once bought me a Valentine’s Day card that had a musical device in it that played the theme song from “A Love Story.” I kept it in my night stand and every year on that day I would open it and listen to it again. Then the year after she passed, I opened it and the battery was dead.

 

I like to think of old love as a more perfect love than young love. For many of us, we have so many of life’s memories and lessons to share with someone else. We’re not dead yet, and we still have a few things left on the bucket list. We once knew love in a different time and a different place, and now we recognize it again, rearing its head and beckoning to us. We’re not as foolish and ignorant about the subject as we were back then—when we jumped in with both feet.  In our old age, we’re not being driven by roaring glands and foolish dreams that young love can sometimes have.  So, this time, we put just our toes in the water. We find the pond warm and welcoming. We find it as a place where we learn to laugh and love all over again. We find ourselves so much more patient and conciliatory than we used to be. We realize we’re not starting over. We’re just writing the epilog and maybe, just maybe, if we let it-- it will be the best part of our story.