Sunday, January 24, 2021

TRIBUTE TO MY FAMILY

                                                 

Mother Theresa once said and I quote. “We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked and homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved and uncared for is the greatest poverty.” We ask “how can anyone be unloved and uncared for in our society?” Even the animals of the forest, and the birds of the air will fight to the death to protect their young. They will find nourishment and no matter how hungry they are themselves, eat their fill and then purge it for their babies to eat. Not a delicate analogy I know but it shows you where their priorities are and where ours fail. And to think, we call ourselves the top of the food chain.

 

I know poverty when I see it and talk about it because I once lived it. I once complained to my grandfather that it was demoralizing to see my classmates in school, dressed to the hilt in the latest fashions and I was wearing hand me downs from my cousin. My grandfather told me, “No one cares what you are wearing and if they do, that’s a flaw in their character and you don’t need them. Just be humble. So you see even though I lived in poverty, I was loved and sometimes its hard for kids to understand it that way but as you age you remember less and less the things you went without, but you will never forget those that loved you.

 

Even in old age your friends and family are the glue that binds your life together. I am no longer living in poverty and haven’t for a long, long time. In fact, my needs are few and easily met but yet I crave love and attention still, as do most of us. When I was young man there was a song that became popular called “Little Things mean a lot.” There were a couple of verses from that song that I never forgot and they went like this. “Blow me a kiss from across the room. Tell me I’m nice when I’m not. Touch my hair as you pass my chair. Little things mean a lot. Give me your hand when I’ve lost my way. Give me your shoulder to cry on. Whether the day is bright or gray. Give me your heart to rely on.

 

We have become so materialistic. Such Me people. Give me cars, give me electronics, give me boats and toys. Well I’m here to tell you that I have had all of these things in my life and my satisfaction was short lived. My real joy came from the people I have met and loved and enjoyed life with. Long after I am gone ,those materialistic things I had will be gone too. But the love I gave, will live on in those who gave me that heart to rely on. 

 

I go back to my hometown from time to time. I always drive down the street I used to live on. The old house, AKA shack, is gone and in its place is an empty lot. On one corner of that lot still stands a lilacs bush. The only survivor of a day gone by. I remember my mom in the spring walking to the corner of our yard with her shears to cut a bouquet for the table. Then the well- spring of memories comes flowing out of me and then come the tears for parents and a brother who passed on and then come the memories of Christmas’s and family get-togethers and picnics in the yard. No memories of anything tangible, only the stories and thoughts of a very loving family that once lived and loved and raised some kids in poverty yes, but in a loving atmosphere that today just keeps on giving. I guess it really wasn’t poverty afterall.

Tuesday, January 19, 2021

GOOD HUMOR

  

 


 

I have always loved those people who make us laugh. With all of the troubles in the world now days, having a good laugh is an aphrodisiac for many of us. My family was always one laugh away from complete happiness and that was something that came from my Dads family mostly. Except for my Uncle Milton on mom’s side, who I think coined the “Pull my finger” routine. I gave his old finger a pull even when I knew what was coming. He could have been another Henny Youngman, given the chance.

 

My father worked sunup to sundown and always looked tired, but whenever I heard a good joke, it was mandatory that I told dad, so he could add it to his repertoire. I shared many moments with that man over the years but none so precious as the times we laughed together. He would often tell a story, and yes some of them off color, and my mother would frown and scold him and three minutes later she would excuse herself and go in the other room and laugh. He laughed harder every time he told his jokes and sometimes you would break out laughing with him and you hadn’t even heard the punch line yet but you knew it was going to be good, --- “And your smiling right now aren’t you?” He was a poor man all of his life but yet he was rich in spirit. My siblings and I have carried on the tradition and from family get togethers to weddings, reunions and yes even funerals there is always some hilarity sprinkled in. It’s just the Holst way of doing business.

 

Sometimes we crossed the line a little but it was never malicious. Oh, we got kicked out of a few campgrounds and when Dad was lying dying in the hospital and we were sharing stories around his bed the head nurse came down and told us to stifle it. But Dad wasn’t gone yet, he was just unconscious and I swear I saw the corner of his mouth  turn down just a little bit. It’s the way he would have wanted it. 

 

I know the family that prays together stays together, or so they say, but the family that laughs together isn’t far behind. I think often of Robin Williams who despite all of the bad things that were tormenting him in his personal life, made the whole world laugh. I think of Andy my fellow firefighter who would start cracking you up the minute he saw your face and you knew he had another good one. He once told me a joke, when we were crawling through a smoke and heat filled hallway looking for a fire and we both had to stop and turn on the bypass on our air tanks because we were losing our breath. God rest his soul. I hope he finds my dad in heaven. They would have a ball together.

 

It’s a sad time in our world right now and we need these colorful people more then ever. For nothing can take you from the depths of despair faster than a good rib tickler that was meant to buoy your spirits. Yes, there are times that are sacred and common sense will be your guide. But if you have a good joke share it at the right time, which in the Holst family is most anytime.

 

 

 

 

 

   

 

MY MEMOIR

 

A few years back I decided to write my memoirs and now I’m pretty much finished. Not that my life has been anything that earth shattering but I have always felt that everybody has a story to tell. A story that no one will ever know about you, unless you write it down before you pass. I have on several occasions had opportunities to write peoples memoirs for them. It’s a hard thing to do because in order to do it, it must be the unvarnished truth and in their own words and not many people are willing to talk like that with a complete stranger. It also can involve volumes of experiences in a long-lived life. I find it a huge loss to have lived a life well lived and let it all go to the grave with you. Rich or poor, famous or not, you have a story to tell. I have found that to write with feeling you have to be able to feel the pain, suffering and the joy and happiness in people’s experiences. The right words have always been there to use but to be authentic to the story they must be the right fit. I was blessed with two things in life that I am eternally grateful for. A stellar memory and an equally vivid imagination. I believe it was Mark Twain who said, “My memory is so good, that sometimes I remember things that never even happened.” You see when your memory fails you sometimes it’s your imagination that fills in the gaps. As long as you don’t stray too far from the topic and stay somewhat relevant, it works for most people. You can’t remember everything. I’m not sure who I will share my memoirs with. Most likely family because they were part of them but I have written them and maybe they are just for posterity in my family but where they go from there Is not up to me.

 

I once had a friend who had a new joke for me each time we talked. Some of them were side busters but he delivered them in this monotone voice with no expression at all and when he was done, I never knew when it was appropriate to laugh or not. Now my father on the other hand, who was a great story teller would have you laughing before he ever got to the punch line because of his own laughing even though it was the same tired old jokes all the time. It was all in his delivery. It’s that way with your life’s experiences too. It’s what makes a book a page turner or just something to brace up the bookend in your bookcase. It’s not what you say, its how you say it and not everyone knows the most compelling way to express themselves but somewhere there is someone who does and there is no shame in asking for help.

 

I love to listen to people’s stories and experiences. And as I said at the start of this, you need to find someone to help you tell their story. You need to break your life down into sections like your childhood, your teen age years, your college years or pre married years. Your married life and your family and career, or military service. Your senior years. It’s not easy and it will take a lot of soul searching but it’s all a part of your story. It not about your failures and shortcomings unless you want it to be. It’s more about what you experienced in life and it’s not to rewrite your life. Those sorry’s don’t belong in your story, let the readers be your judge. Length has nothing to do with your story either. In fact, too many words are probably worse than not enough. What is important is to find someone who can emulate your feelings and actions by turning them into appropriate words, so when your written story is read. They will say, “Yes that how I remember him/her. You have the power to influence others with your story and if that happens, what better thing could you leave for them, then a story of a life well lived. Your story.

 

 

Thursday, January 7, 2021

SAVE THE EARTH

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I think when human beings were introduced to this earth-- however you believe we evolved-- it was the beginning of the end for our earth, as we know it. We had no idea what we were going to do to the earth just by being here but we are finding out now. To be fair some of it is unavoidable but instead of finding ways to deal with the bad effects, we pass it off as inconsequential and not a problem. If your entering old age that might be even truer but yet, we owe it to the youngest generation to leave this earth as clean as possible and hope that someday they will repay the favor.

 

There are deniers out there who scoff at this kind of rhetoric. Their self-obsessive life styles have no time for doomsday stories. They like life the way it is and they’re not changing for anyone. They’ll do everything in their power to thwart the efforts of those who want to try and save the earth. They are threatened by efforts to change their lifestyle, and most of it just boils down to money and they can’t get enough of it. Just ask the fossil fuel industry.

 

I am in awe of this earth and all of its creatures and the way it has for years, had all of these checks and balances to take care of our bad behavior. But the plants and oceans that cleanse the very air we breathe and the water we drink, are now being overwhelmed. Had one looked at the earth four hundred years ago it would have seemed to be beyond our capabilities to destroy it in the way we are doing it. But hey—never count us out huh?

 

It is beyond any reasoning abilities I now have, how greed, can make one not care enough for this earth. There are hundreds of thousands of creatures going extinct as we speak. You would have to be really out of the loop to not think that that isn’t going to have an impact on the rest of them and us. The last major extinction of the earth came at the hands of an asteroid. Unless another one comes along or Yellowstone blows its top, this time we will be doing the natural disasters one better and all by ourselves.

 

I fully realize that there are some who read this and say this is just another left leaning nut off on a tangent but you would be wrong. I am not a left leaning anything but an independent thinker who detests what political parties have done to our government. I support neither of them. That being said, disagree if you must but I hope its what you truly believe in and not a right leaning political position that you feel you have to take, to support the party faithful. Do me one other favor. Send me credible proof, that what is happening to our earth is not our fault. We all know it’s happening, there is little argument about that unless your living under a rock, so the only argument seems to be why it’s happening. And remember something else we can agree about is-- it has happened before. But there was always an explanation for that and if it wasn’t a mountain blowing its top or an asteroid hitting the earth, it was a natural phenomena of climate change that took tens of thousands of years to change things. What we are talking about, that is happening right now, has taken only a few short centuries.

 

 

 

 

Tuesday, January 5, 2021

HOPE FOR A BETTER YEAR

                                                             

Aul Lang Syne is and will always be, synonymous with the end of a year and the beginning of another year. It is as inherent to New Year’s Eve, as Pomp and Circumstance is to graduation. It is New Year’s Eve’s signature song. When written by Robert Burns in 1778 it was a Scottish language poem that literally translates to “Days Gone by.” It has become the traditional song to sing on New Year’s Eve, all around the world. It also has been deemed the most famous song, that no one knows, yet everyone has butchered on a tipsy New Year’s Eve.

 

I do think it’s fitting and proper to see the old year out and welcome the new one in, but yet if it’s really our desire to improve our lives as we live them out. Then it too becomes a time to not only say “Out with the old and in with the new” but to make the new, something better than it was. A new you, a new model and a chance to tie this change back to a significant date and time and there is no better day to do that-- then New Year’s Day

 

Since the time of the invention of the wheel mankind has always been looking for a better. wheel. That one that Barney Rubble and Fred Flintstone rode around on, back in the day was just a starting point for the wheel. That’s the way our lives should be structured too. That 18-year-old person, turned out at the end of a high school education, should be just a starting point and it shouldn’t stop there. We need to strive to be all that is within our capability’s to be. Anything else is just a waste.

 

We do have something to celebrate this year. A vaccine that normally takes’ multiple years to test and develop was done in a fraction of that time. It’s a testament to what can be accomplished when all the chips are on the table. When Government and private enterprise put their collective heads together in an all-out effort to make something work. This pandemic as terrible as it has been, was the impetus to make this happen. We need to learn from this, what is truly possible when push comes to shove and shove comes to a can-do attitude. This was truly a team effort. Not just in this country but in many countries.

 

Now that we know we can do it. Next time, let’s make it a more proactive action. The biggest shame in all of this is the Laissez faire attitude we had in this country about the disease. Oh, this isn’t a shot at just the administration although they were complicit. That attitude has been around for a long time in this country and on a lot of subjects. Sometimes as my Mother would say, “People get too big for their britches.” We still have a way to go before we can claim victory. There is lot of harm that was done that cannot be undone and the word victory may be the wrong word. Maybe the word correction would be more appropriate. There is a lot of suffering to still be suffered but lets’ let that suffering always be a reminder of what can happen when you get-- “Too big for your britches.”

 

It is my hope, my prayer that as the ball falls this New Year’s Eve, we all see a new beginning. That we will always be that can-do society. There will always be other viruses and if we can keep the politics out of the solutions, they will be squashed before they ever get started. “May Auld Acquaintance Be forgotten in Days of Auld Lang Syne.”   Happy New Year.   Mike